24 y.o

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October 17th, 2024

Little bit late from my birthday, but I want to keep the memory that I've ever had in every year I become more older. So, that I can track my personality growth in the future. 

Three days ago, I just turn 24. Yet, still discovering what I want to do in my rest of life. But, this year is different from the last year. Yes, I got my first job in a telecommunication company at Jakarta. I am happy because at least I have my own salary and not being a burden for my dad. But, I got a new question after I got a job and start live as a "real" adult. In the previous year, I kept asking myself about who am I? Still learning about my personality. But, this year is different. I ask to myself, "Am I wrong for following this path?, Is my decision right for my life?" Few things that I questioned myself are my decision for choose this company and field as my first job. The second thing is, I actually bought a bootcamp for UI/UX career, but actually I also already learn a little bit about that field in online course which is more affordable and I am not finishing that course yet. Also want to apply for Management Trainee, but I already bought a bootcamp that start in November. So, that will be tight schedule I would face. I afraid that the cost I spent for bootcamp just waste my time, energy, and money. 

I am afraid to be fail and make the wrong move. This age is a serious age to me, this is not the time for just having fun and not think anything about life in the future. Is this path going to be success in me? Is my goal really realistic to achieve?  first, I want to switching career, second I have a plan to study abroad maybe in 2027 or 2028, and so many plan that I didn't achieve yet. So, In the middle of my working life, I have to prepare myself to reach each of my dreams. I just want to explore everything but my body and mind just too tired. Am I capable for doing all of those things? 

24 years old is really something. Life changing that make me doubt my own move. But, the positive thing in this year is I think I love myself more and become more adaptive to some of situation and place, but still an emotional person and overthinker tho. :) But it's okay, that was normal to overthink something. Everyone have been through those overthinking phase. This year I also learn how to respect other people and how to not care other people at the same time. Just focus on myself is the best thing. Anddd, last but not least, stop tell people about your life plan. Just keep at your room, in front of your desk and just tell to Allah. That is the best thing I learn this year. Even tell you have a crush on someone? hahahaa, don't ever think to tell someone again in the future okay. wkwkwkwk that was funny tho. 


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dear me in the future that read this, how are you? are you doing well? are you already switching your career? Are your plan works? And the most important thing, how's your life? are you happy? please be happy in every path that you stepped on. Because if you still live on that path, that means you have responsibility and Allah is guiding you. So, just believe in yourself and trust Allah.

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